Gym Types (from rebkell.net )

[davidfcooper]

1. "Patrick Ewing" This is the person who sweats profusely, and doesn't wipe down the equipment that they use....

2. "DIESEL" There is always that one skinny person who attempts to curl the 55's, all while using every muscle in their back and legs to get the weight up....meanwhile, you are standing next to them using good form, curling the 35's...

3. "Knowledge" This is the one old dude, who drops little nuggets of info as to how to improve your workout....you really don't want to hear it, but he INSISTS that you try it his way...he doesn't leave you alone and follows you to the machine, where he watches you like a hawk, all while professing how this did wonders for him back in the early 50's.....

4. "Little Wayne" These are the chicken chested guys who walk around in their beaters, which hang off of them like a moo-moo

5. "The Grunter" Ok, you are benching 350...I don't need to hear the constipation sound coming from you from 70 yards away....

6. "Zubaz" I think those were the name of those snazzy pants that many of the NFL guys wore back in the early 90's, circa Bruce Smith...anyways, this is the fugazi bodybuilder who walks around like he owns the place wearing this type of pants, not noticing that people snicker behind his back

7. "Magda" The fake tanned chick that thinks her doo-doo don't stink....every gym has one

8. 'The Creep" Between sets, he tries to spark conversation with every, and I mean EVERY female that walks by....."hey ma, what's good with ya?"

9. "Officer Dan" NO LEGS....this is the dude who works his upper body, which is HUGE, but his lower body looks something like a 3rd grade spelling bee champ

10. "Usher" Hey, look at my abs.....this is the dude who spends more time in the mirror looking at themselves than your local prom queen....however, they fail to realize that they weigh 135.....congrats on being skinny dude....

11. "Mystikal...(It ain't my fault)" This is the guy who has excuses for why they can't exercise with as much weight as they once did before... "I tore my rotator and I didn't get surgery bla bla bla ... I used bench 410."

12. "Jesus" There's always that one dude who worksout in sandals .

13. "Bob The Body Builder" There are construction guys who get off their job site and come to work out in their jeans and and Wolverine boots .

14. The Wannabe: Inspired by professional athletes but kind of lazy nonetheless and still trying to lose those last 20 pounds. Seems to need to fix hair, re-tie shoes, adjust shirt, adjust machines, adjust position -- and rest -- quite often. Needs two newspapers and her PDA on hand to do 1/2 hour on the elliptical. You wonder if she knows anything about nutrition 'cause you see her at the gym all the time but she's still not buff...

15. The Entitiled One: (usually male): Thinks none of the signs around the gym are meant for him. Uses weights that are too heavy and then DROPS them on last rep. Everytime. Never returns weights to rack. Ever. Never returns any equipment to proper location, even when going to get something else to use. Leaves empty water bottle wherever it is when he's done with it, even if garbage can is 3 feet away. Thinks you're looking at him 'cause he's hot.

16. "The Paris" - Girl who goes to the gym in full makeup and earrings jewlery and skimpy outfit and trys to pick up guys and who flirts with anyone who can curl anything larger than a Amstel Light. Also known as the buzzard.

17. "Guido" - Cut out Muscle tank (1 Sz too small) - Short shorts - Travolta Hair - Gold Chain / Cross - Probably arrives in either Camero or Monte Carlo. Ipod Jammin Thin Lizzy, Styx and Def Leppard so loud you can sing along 40 yds away.

18. "The Posse" - Guys who work out in groups of at least 5 persons allthewhile yelling encouragement to each other or calling each other nicknames. You Know the guy "One more K-Dog one more!"

19. "Soap?" - This guy smells like garlic buttered arse before he ever lifts a weight and it only gets worse and worse - You can tell he as been on a certain machine 10 min after he lhas left -- He usually ends his workout in the sauna smelling up the joint

20. "Chatty Cathy" The person who takes half an hour to do three sets of an exercise because he's talking to a friend he hasn't seen in months.

21. "Cutpurse" The person who snags your station after you leave it for 15 seconds between sets, fully weighted and with towel draped over it.

22. "Law, Murphy" The person who arrives at your apparatus 2 seconds before you do. (Compounded if the person also becomes Chatty Cathy.)

Comments

[laffinman.livejournal.com]

...wow! them folks sure get around.....cant begin to guess how many offices and factories they've worked in......must be in the millions.