morning after girls night out

Girls Night Out

Your wife decides to go out with her friends drinking and dancing....

You're okay with it, because you get to watch sports

and play on the internet all night...

You hear her stumble into bed around 4 and laugh knowing

she's going to have a monster hangover....

You wake up next morning and go outside to the family Volvo,

which she used last night....

You sigh in relief because it's all in one piece....

You circle the car looking for dents and find none....


But .... Wait a minute....

http://putfile.com/pic.php?pic=3/7809520864.jpg&s=x11

morning after girls night out

Girls Night Out

Your wife decides to go out with her friends drinking and dancing....

You're okay with it, because you get to watch sports

and play on the internet all night...

You hear her stumble into bed around 4 and laugh knowing

she's going to have a monster hangover....

You wake up next morning and go outside to the family Volvo,

which she used last night....

You sigh in relief because it's all in one piece....

You circle the car looking for dents and find none....


But .... Wait a minute....

http://putfile.com/pic.php?pic=3/7809520864.jpg&s=x11

gender wars humor: female phrases translated for guys

Fine
This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and
you need to shut up.

Five Minutes
If she is getting dressed, this is half an hour. Five minutes is only
five minutes if you have just been given 5 more minutes to watch the
game before helping around the house.

Nothing
This is the calm before the storm. This means "something" and you
should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with "nothing" usually
end in "fine".

Go Ahead
This is a dare, not permission, DON'T DO IT!

Loud Sigh
Although not actually a word, the loud sigh is often misunderstood by
men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why
she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over
"Nothing".

That's Okay
This is one of the most dangerou s statements that a woman can make to
a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard
before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

Thanks
This is the least used of all words in the female vocabulary. If a
woman is thanking you, do not question it, just say you're welcome and
back out of the room slowly.




Send this to the Men you know and want to help, or to the Women you
know for a laugh.

gender wars humor: female phrases translated for guys

Fine
This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and
you need to shut up.

Five Minutes
If she is getting dressed, this is half an hour. Five minutes is only
five minutes if you have just been given 5 more minutes to watch the
game before helping around the house.

Nothing
This is the calm before the storm. This means "something" and you
should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with "nothing" usually
end in "fine".

Go Ahead
This is a dare, not permission, DON'T DO IT!

Loud Sigh
Although not actually a word, the loud sigh is often misunderstood by
men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why
she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over
"Nothing".

That's Okay
This is one of the most dangerou s statements that a woman can make to
a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard
before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

Thanks
This is the least used of all words in the female vocabulary. If a
woman is thanking you, do not question it, just say you're welcome and
back out of the room slowly.




Send this to the Men you know and want to help, or to the Women you
know for a laugh.

Jewish mothers video link

http://www.aish.com/a/PurimMoms.asp

Jewish mothers video link

http://www.aish.com/a/PurimMoms.asp

blaming God for bird flu (thanks to doc_neuro)

Muslim extremist version: http://www.ynetnews.com/articles/0,7340,L-3230110,00.html

Jewish extremist version: http://www.ynetnews.com/articles/0,7340,L-3229316,00.html

blaming God for bird flu (thanks to doc_neuro)

Muslim extremist version: http://www.ynetnews.com/articles/0,7340,L-3230110,00.html

Jewish extremist version: http://www.ynetnews.com/articles/0,7340,L-3229316,00.html

planet quiz (which doesn't quite fit me but thanks anyway to <lj site="livejournal.com" user="laceco

What Planet Are You From?


this quiz was made by The Autist Formerly Known As Tim

planet quiz (which doesn't quite fit me but thanks anyway to <user site="livejournal.com" user="lace

What Planet Are You From?


this quiz was made by The Autist Formerly Known As Tim